Now that I'm 30....

I've been waiting.
Ever since I turned 30.
I've been waiting for all those secrets that they keep from the 29 and younger crowd.
I knew they would be great--explain all the tricky things in life, make everything go smoother. Or just the jokes that only people who have been thirty would get.
Well, I was beginning to think that maybe I had just imagined it all because I wanted thirty to be so special...until today.
Today, with my thirty year old brain, I was able to figure something out that a mere 29 year old would be clueless of.

I figured out the true meaning of Black Friday.

Now, I am a little skeptical of sharing this. I haven't gotten my thirty year old handbook yet.
All of you older than me already know this, but I'm afraid that some youngster might get their hands on it and through the whole planet out of alignment.
But I'm gonna bank on all those young whipper-snappers keeping there mouths shut and behaving til they're thirty.

Ok, here goes.
The real reason for Black Friday is to----

cover all of your windows and mirrors and shake your naked booty!
It's naked dancing time!!

I suggest doing it after a shower, great way to dry off.
If you have kids in the house, close your bedroom door and call 5 minutes of mommy time.
If you like the way your body looks jiggling in all it's glory, keep the mirrors uncovered! (might be best to keep the windows covered though)
Play your favorite music loudly and stomp that naked arse all over the house!!

So, why do we do this?
(because we can)
Age has perks and naked dancing is one of them.
Celebrate what you have while you bounce, twirl, and wiggle away!!
(might even burn some calories too)
Do it alone or with those you love.
If you just can't  do naked, show off those rockin' undies!!

Have fun! Let loose! Don't be afraid to just be yourself!!

So who's going to join me this year in this new found tradition??
Who's going to help me redefine Black Friday?

Sounds better than all that financial mumbo-jumbo, right?